The Husband and Father Your Wife and Children Deserve

I want you to think back about when you first became aChristian or when you made a major life decision?  Who did you go to seek advice about this decision?  Whose example made you consider this change? 

9 times out of 10, we follow the examples and life decisions of people we respect.  A Parent, a Coach, a Leader or a Friend.  Someone held influence over us and we trusted their example and respected their character.  Now let me ask you this?  Are you being that person for someone else?

I’m sitting here in another foreign country, far from my family during the Holidays and reading a book about one of the most successful football coaches of all time.  His walk with Christ began when he noticed men that he respected had changed their lives in major ways by coming to Christ.  The funny thing is, the people who set this example had no idea that someone was watching them or making decisions based on their example.

Now let me tie this in with Dante’s posts on Purity.

Have you ever wondered why guys like Tiger Woods or Kobe Bryant cheat on their wives?  They have money, fame, and some really beautiful wives and then they throw it all away for one night of passion or to put another notch in their count of women they have been with?   We look at these examples and say “What an idiot, he had it all and throw it all away!”   

I guarantee, at this very moment, someone is looking at your life and your family and wishing they had what you had.

This realization really hit me a few years ago when a friend of mine stated this to me.   My friend just wanted to have a loving wife and family but he was sadly going through his second divorce.  Both times, his wives had cheated on him.  He didn’t come out and say it directly, but in a moment of emotion he asked me how I did it with my family.  He had been watching. 

Over the last two years, wives have asked my wife if I would talk to their husbands or if being around me could somehow rub off on their husbands.  I was dumbfounded. 

To me there is an unwritten guy code and unless I am a very close accountability friend; I wouldn’t go and tell some guy that his marriage is screwed up.  However, my example was speaking volumes and other people had been watching.   

Because of my ignorance and selfishness, I almost lost my beautiful wife and children once.  Once I almost lost them, the realization hit me of what I was really losing.  I had the most beautiful woman that other guys envied and two beautiful children, one boy and one girl.  People close to me were saying “What an idiot, he had it all and throw it all away!”  Does this sound familiar?  Luckily, God intervened and brought me close to the edge but didn’t let me fall over it.  I made a vow to God and my wife that I would become, not what society said was a good husband, but what my wife and children deserved.      

What does your wife and children deserve? 

If there are any questions read  - Ephesians 5: 25-33

We are setting the example everyday by what we do, what we say, and the lives we lead.  The slightest flirtation with a co-worker or other woman should never rear its ugly head when we are on duty.  Our words should uplift and edify others.  Our work ethic should be superior.  We should wear our Character and Integrity on our sleeves for everyone to see because whether we like it or not, people are watching.  Someone is watching you every day and wondering if this Christianity thing is really worth it.

Are we perfect? Hardly.  Do we make mistakes?  Always.  But as Russell Crow stated in Gladiator “What we do in life, echoes in eternity.”

I choose to be the husband and father my wife and children deserve.