05 Jan 2007, Posted by Lance in General, No Comments.

Fatherhood

by Traci Gray

Before the industrial revolution, fathers often worked side by side with
their sons and instructed their children in spiritual values. When
industrialization took over the American landscape, fathers left their farms
and headed to the factories. Fourteen- to 16-hour workdays set the stage for
the absentee father.

Eventually, fathers came to be regarded as merely breadwinners who fulfilled
their paternal duties by providing.

But is that image changing again?

Research shows that tweens and teens need the firm leadership a father
provides. A child performs better in school if his father takes an interest in
his education. Children have more confidence when their fathers spend time with
them and show them affection. Kids learn from watching their fathers’ decisions
and listening to logical explanations.

Work pressures and other commitments may make it easy for some men to feel
they don’t have the time. However, a 2002 study found that men born after 1965
spent 50 percent more time per workday with their children than boomer fathers
(an average of 3.4 hours, versus 2.2 hours). That same year a workplace survey
conducted by the Society of Human Resource Management discovered that men
ranked the need to balance work and home life higher than their female
colleagues.

Involved fathers find the time to attend their children’s games and
recitals. They pull themselves away from the TV to show their children how to
change a tire and balance a checkbook. They set firm limits and encourage their
kids to do their best — even when they fail.

Take a look at the questions below.

What did you need from your father that he gave you?
What did you need but didn’t receive?
How did his positive input help you to succeed?
How did the negative aspects possibly set a series of consequences into motion that you may still experience?

The answers to these questions may reveal what your children desperately
long for. Now it’s up to you to provide it. It may make your pocketbook a
little thinner, but the benefits could be priceless.

Originally posted at http://www.family.org/parenting/A000001228.cfm