Impacts of homes without a Father

What is the big deal....?

Photo by Leo Weijs

Photo by Leo Weijs

More Data on the Extent of Fatherlessness

  • An estimated 24.7 million children (33%) live absent their biological father.
    Source: U.S. Census Bureau, Current Population Survey, “Living Arrangements of Children under 18 Years/1 and Marital Status of Parents by Age, Sex, Race, and Hispanic Origin/2 and Selected Characteristics  of the Child for all Children 2010.” Table C3. Internet Release Date November, 2010.
  • Of students in grades 1 through 12, 39 percent (17.7 million) live in homes absent their biological fathers.
    Source: Nord, Christine Winquist, and Jerry West. Fathers’ and Mothers’ Involvement in their Children’s Schools by Family Type and Resident Status. Table 1. (NCES 2001-032). Washington, DC: U.S. Dept of Education, National Center of Education Statistics, 2001.
  • 57.6% of black children, 31.2% of Hispanic children, and 20.7% of white children are living absent their biological fathers.
    Source: Family Structure and Children’s Living Arrangements 2012. Current Population Report. U.S.  Census Bureau July 1, 2012.
  • According to 72.2 % of the U.S. population, fatherlessness is the most significant family or social problem facing America.
    Source: National Center for Fathering, Fathering in America Poll, January, 1999.

maxresdefaultThings to know:

  • God created man and woman
  • God has a plan for the family
  • God tells us to be fruitful and to multiply
  • God wants us to be His disciples and to go and make more disciples sharing the Good News!
  • God has a plan for Fathers
  • God has a plan for Legacy dads

Let me ask you this:  Are you too busy building your kingdom and your desires and your habits and recreational lifestyle or are you choosing to be a part of God’s plan and build His Kingdom?

Fathers lives matter!

Many churches today have thriving women’s ministries, power worship experiences and world-class children’s curriculum yet struggle to implement effective biblical road-maps and turn-key strategies for empowering and discipling men, parents, and marriages.

  • 93% of families will follow when the father takes an active role in his faith and walk with Christ.  When fathers are not active in their faith, 60% of children stop attending church or leave the faith altogether even if their mother still attends regularly.
  • Church ministries will average only 40 hours per year to influence the lives of children, youth and teens while parents will average over 3000 hours.
  • 1/3 of Church attending Christian marriages will end in divorce.  We can lower these numbers by effective marriage outreach and premarital counsel.

Legacy Dad empowers men to become the spiritual leaders of their families and take an active role in their faith. 

Looking forward to you spending time with God this week through reading His Word and praying to Him!!!

 

Blessings,
Dante

 

 

 

The Father Wound…

As an Elder and men’s ministry leader I can tell you up close and personal that the Father wound is a very serious problem in our culture.  For some in can result in addictions, for others it could be a plethora of symptoms from isolation to violence and complete psychological issues even including abandonment.

For some, the mere mention of the word father can trigger a multitude of mixed emotions.  Raw emotions and even pain and regret.  For some of the men that pass my path, they are still waiting to hear the words from their fathers that they were proud of them and glad that they have become the men that they are today.

There is a deep crevice and wound that can never be filled on this earth without God’s intervention.  I remember talking to one gentleman who was in a lot of pain and anguish because his dad opted for violence instead of love.  For abuse instead of healthy emotion.

Without the positive influence of a godly man who fears the Lord and is under the authority of Scripture, it is hard for children and wives to thrive.  This is not God’s plan.  His plan is for us to love and accept his Son, Jesus Christ.  To share His Gospel.  To love our neighbor as ourselves and to seek holiness and put our old sin nature to death daily.

Men strive for healthy relationships and to be affirmed by those that they love and care for.  These men are looking and yearning for the words “I approve”, “I am proud of you” and “I love you, son”.  For some of these men they may never hear this from their earthly dads.


Then you sometimes meet men who have unbelievable legacies of generational faith and I am humbled and thankful that these men had the chance to grow up in this legacy.

This is not to say that these dads, granddad and great granddad always get it right, because they don’t.  They are sinners like you and me.  The difference is that they know whose authority that they are under – God!  They are humble to the word of God and they are accountable.

These men are fortunate and thankful for the childhood that they have and for the relationships that God has brought them and continues to bring them.


Then there may be some of you like me.  Our grew up with a really good dad with good intentions, sometimes a bit too authoritarian and over aggressive on the discipline, BUT a man who gave me the work ethic that I have today and a man who worked a lot, but didn’t necessarily know how to tell his kids that he loved them.

Don’t get me wrong, there were a lot of things that my dad did right (He provided, cared for, educated and coached us through life.  He taught me the importance of not being in debt (not that I always listened) and how to be a man.

The one thing was that he did not know the Lord growing up and he was prone to anger.  He was socially inept in the fatherhood parameters as he lost his mom when he was 11 years old and his dad spoke broken English and didn’t always understand what it meant to be dad.  My dad lost his mom and his dad lost his wife – they did what they could.  So he worked a lot more than most to provide because that was important to him.

Also, my dad grew up in the Great Depression.  He doesn’t understand these generations that applaud debt and immorality.


Some Scripture for leaving a legacy:

 

Psalm English Standard Version (ESV)

Unless the Lord Builds the House
A Song of Ascents. Of Solomon.

127 Unless the Lord builds the house,
those who build it labor in vain.
Unless the Lord watches over the city,
the watchman stays awake in vain.
2 It is in vain that you rise up early
and go late to rest,
eating the bread of anxious toil;
for he gives to his beloved sleep.
3 Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord,
the fruit of the womb a reward.
4 Like arrows in the hand of a warrior
are the children[a] of one’s youth.
5 Blessed is the man
who fills his quiver with them!
He shall not be put to shame
when he speaks with his enemies in the gate.[b]

Deuteronomy 6:6-9English Standard Version (ESV)

6 And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. 7 You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise. 8 You shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes. 9 You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.

“Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God; trust also in me. In my Father’s house are many rooms; if it were not so, I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you.” –John 14:1-2

For you did not receive a spirit that makes you a slave again to fear, but you received the Spirit of sonship. And by him we cry, “Abba, Father.” The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God’s children. — Romans 8:15-16

“Which of you, if his son asks for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake? If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him!” — Matthew 7:9-11

How great is the love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are! –1 John 3:1

===

Image-1If you have a father wound or someone you know has this wound, don’t try to fix them, instead lead them to a group of godly men and walk with them.  Share with them and pray with them.   Read the word with them and worship with them.

Let them see that there God is the only one who can truly fill this Father Wound!

To God Be the Glory,

 

Dante

 

 

 

Is your church building disciples…

...one relationship at a time?

1 Timothy 3:1-7English Standard Version (ESV)
1timothyQualifications for Overseers
3 The saying is trustworthy: If anyone aspires to the office of overseer, he desires a noble task. 2 Therefore an overseer[a] must be above reproach, the husband of one wife,[b] sober-minded, self-controlled, respectable, hospitable, able to teach, 3 not a drunkard, not violent but gentle, not quarrelsome, not a lover of money. 4 He must manage his own household well, with all dignity keeping his children submissive, 5 for if someone does not know how to manage his own household, how will he care for God’s church? 6 He must not be a recent convert, or he may become puffed up with conceit and fall into the condemnation of the devil. 7 Moreover, he must be well thought of by outsiders, so that he may not fall into disgrace, into a snare of the devil.

Titus 1:5-9English Standard Version (ESV)

Qualifications for Elders
5 This is why I left you in Crete, so that you might put what remained into order, and appoint elders in every town as I directed you— 6 if anyone is above reproach, the husband of one wife,[a] and his children are believers[b] and not open to the charge of debauchery or insubordination. 7 For an overseer,[c] as God’s steward, must be above reproach. He must not be arrogant or quick-tempered or a drunkard or violent or greedy for gain, 8 but hospitable, a lover of good, self-controlled, upright, holy, and disciplined. 9 He must titushold firm to the trustworthy word as taught, so that he may be able to give instruction in sound[d] doctrine and also to rebuke those who contradict it.


If your church does not have a discipleship plan to build Elders who are to care and shepherd the flock, then I am going to say that your church is not growing (disciples).  In case we haven’t realized it yet, the Church is a Family.  That is, because we died to self and were born again in Christ, we are now sons and daughters of the living King.  We should no longer have an identity crisis in life – we are heirs to God’s Kingdom.

Jesus commands the disciples before his death (and resurrection) in Matthew 28:

Matthew 28:16-20English Standard Version (ESV)

The Great Commission
16 Now the eleven disciples went to Galilee, to the mountain to which Jesus had directed them. 17 And when they saw him they worshiped him, but some doubted. 18 And Jesus came and said to them, “All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. 19 Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in[a] the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, 20 teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you. And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age.”

The Great Shepherd (Jesus) gave us the command to go and make disciples.  Note that he didn’t just say go and make baby Christians who never grow in their faith.  The Creator himself tells us to be fruitful and multiply.  If it is alive, then it multiplies, that is the laws of nature.

If your church is alive in Christ, then it is building its disciples and they are growing in Christ and the church will bear the fruit of the Spirit and it will multiply.

So tell me, is your church building up Elders to oversee and shepherd its church (the Family of God)?

Blessings,

Dante

 

 

No Longer Slaves…

Friday's Song Day

 

“No Longer Slaves”

You unravel me with a melody
You surround me with a song
Of deliverance from my enemies
‘Til all my fears are gone

[2x]
I’m no longer a slave to fear
I am a child of God

From my mother’s womb
You have chosen me
Love has called my name
I’ve been born again
Into your family
Your blood flows through my veins

[4x]
I’m no longer a slave to fear
I am a child of God

I am surrounded
By the arms of the father
I am surrounded
By songs of deliverance

We’ve been liberated
From our bondage
We’re the sons and the daughters
Let us sing our freedom

You split the sea
So I could walk right through it
My fears were drowned in perfect love
You rescued me
And I could stand and sing
I am a child of God…

You split the sea
So I could walk right through it
You drowned my fears in perfect love
You rescued me
And I will stand and sing
I am a child of God

Yes, I am
I am a child of God
I am a child of God
Yes, I am
I am a child of God
Full of faith
Yes, I am a child of God
I am a child of God

[3x]
I’m no longer a slave to fear
I am a child of God

Do you call yourself a Christian?

How are you with obedience and submission

Romans 13:1-5English Standard Version (ESV)

submissionSubmission to the Authorities
13 Let every person be subject to the governing authorities. For there is no authority except from God, and those that exist have been instituted by God. 2 Therefore whoever resists the authorities resists what God has appointed, and those who resist will incur judgment. 3 For rulers are not a terror to good conduct, but to bad. Would you have no fear of the one who is in authority? Then do what is good, and you will receive his approval, 4 for he is God’s servant for your good. But if you do wrong, be afraid, for he does not bear the sword in vain. For he is the servant of God, an avenger who carries out God’s wrath on the wrongdoer. 5 Therefore one must be in subjection, not only to avoid God’s wrath but also for the sake of conscience.

Hebrews 13:17English Standard Version (ESV)

17 Obey your leaders and submit to them, for they are keeping watch over your souls, as those who will have to give an account. Let them do this with joy and not with groaning, for that would be of no advantage to you.


If you are a believer in Jesus Christ and you are talking the walk, then your walk should show submission to God’s word and those who He has ordained in authority.  You should humble yourself and fear the Lord and you should obey God’s word – not just hear the words BUT do what they say.

Random Wednesday Thoughts (given all the news and lack of submission to authority)

Blessings,

Dante

 

 

So let your light shine

the Absence of Good

A topic of good vs evil in the office sparked this conversation today:  Click here for the link

The absence of good (Latin: privatio boni) is a theological doctrine that evil, unlike good, is insubstantial so thinking of it as an entity is misleading. Instead, evil is rather the absence or lack (“privation”) of good.[1][2][3] It is typically attributed to St. Augustine of Hippo, who wrote:
And in the universe, even that which is called evil, when it is regulated and put in its own place, only enhances our admiration of the good; for we enjoy and value the good more when we compare it with the evil. For the Almighty God, who, as even the heathen acknowledge, has supreme power over all things, being Himself supremely good, would never permit the existence of anything evil among His works, if He were not so omnipotent and good that He can bring good even out of evil. For what is that which we call evil but the absence of good? In the bodies of animals, disease and wounds mean nothing but the absence of health; for when a cure is effected, that does not mean that the evils which were present—namely, the diseases and wounds—go away from the body and dwell elsewhere: they altogether cease to exist; for the wound or disease is not a substance, but a defect in the fleshly substance,—the flesh itself being a substance, and therefore something good, of which those evils—that is, privations of the good which we call health—are accidents. Just in the same way, what are called vices in the soul are nothing but privations of natural good. And when they are cured, they are not transferred elsewhere: when they cease to exist in the healthy soul, they cannot exist anywhere else.[4]
Perceptions are based on contrast, so that light and dark, good and evil, are imperceptible without each other; in this context, these sets of opposites show a certain symmetry, but a basic study of optics teaches us that light has a physical presence of its own, whereas darkness does not: no “anti-lamp” or “flashdark” can be constructed which casts a beam of darkness onto a surface that is otherwise well-lit. Instead, darkness appears only when sources of light are extinguished or obscured and ends when an object absorbs a disproportionate amount of the light that strikes it.
The relationship between light and darkness is often used to frame a metaphorical understanding of good and evil. The metaphor can be used to answer[citation needed] the problem of evil: If evil, like darkness, does not truly exist, but is only a name we give to our perception of privatio boni, widespread observation of evil does not preclude the possibility of a benevolent, omniscient, and omnipresent God.
If the metaphor can be extended, and good and evil share the same asymmetry as light and darkness, evil can have no source, cannot be projected, and, of itself, can offer no resistance to any source of good, no matter how weak or distant. Then, goodness cannot be actively opposed, and power becomes a consequence of benevolence. However, evil is the default state of the universe, and good exists only through constant effort; any lapse or redirection of good will apparently create evil out of nothing.
This doctrine is also supported by the Bahá’í Faith. ‘Abdu’l-Bahá stated to a French Baha’I woman:
…it is possible that one thing in relation to another may be evil, and at the same time within the limits of its proper being it may not be evil. Then it is proved that there is no evil in existence; all that God created He created good. This evil is nothingness; so death is the absence of life. When man no longer receives life, he dies. Darkness is the absence of light: when there is no light, there is darkness. Light is an existing thing, but darkness is nonexistent. Wealth is an existing thing, but poverty is nonexisting.[5]

As I read this, there are parts of me that are conflicting and needs to be challenged  with Scripture – so I will (and will come back on this topic in the weeks to come).


Matthew 5:16New International Version (NIV)

16 In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.

let your light shineWho is your light?

John 8:12New International Version (NIV)

Dispute Over Jesus’ Testimony

12 When Jesus spoke again to the people, he said, I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.”

 

America the Beautiful

Thank you for all who preserve our freedom as we celebrate Independence Day


The Declaration of Independence: A Transcription

IN CONGRESS, July 4, 1776.

The unanimous Declaration of the thirteen united States of America,

When in the Course of human events, it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the political bands which have connected them with another, and to assume among the powers of the earth, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Nature and of Nature’s God entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.–That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed, –That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness. Prudence, indeed, will dictate that Governments long established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn, that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable, than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same Object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such Government, and to provide new Guards for their future security.–Such has been the patient sufferance of these Colonies; and such is now the necessity which constrains them to alter their former Systems of Government. The history of the present King of Great Britain is a history of repeated injuries and usurpations, all having in direct object the establishment of an absolute Tyranny over these States. To prove this, let Facts be submitted to a candid world.

He has refused his Assent to Laws, the most wholesome and necessary for the public good.
He has forbidden his Governors to pass Laws of immediate and pressing importance, unless suspended in their operation till his Assent should be obtained; and when so suspended, he has utterly neglected to attend to them.
He has refused to pass other Laws for the accommodation of large districts of people, unless those people would relinquish the right of Representation in the Legislature, a right inestimable to them and formidable to tyrants only.
He has called together legislative bodies at places unusual, uncomfortable, and distant from the depository of their public Records, for the sole purpose of fatiguing them into compliance with his measures.
He has dissolved Representative Houses repeatedly, for opposing with manly firmness his invasions on the rights of the people.
He has refused for a long time, after such dissolutions, to cause others to be elected; whereby the Legislative powers, incapable of Annihilation, have returned to the People at large for their exercise; the State remaining in the mean time exposed to all the dangers of invasion from without, and convulsions within.
He has endeavoured to prevent the population of these States; for that purpose obstructing the Laws for Naturalization of Foreigners; refusing to pass others to encourage their migrations hither, and raising the conditions of new Appropriations of Lands.
He has obstructed the Administration of Justice, by refusing his Assent to Laws for establishing Judiciary powers.
He has made Judges dependent on his Will alone, for the tenure of their offices, and the amount and payment of their salaries.
He has erected a multitude of New Offices, and sent hither swarms of Officers to harrass our people, and eat out their substance.
He has kept among us, in times of peace, Standing Armies without the Consent of our legislatures.
He has affected to render the Military independent of and superior to the Civil power.
He has combined with others to subject us to a jurisdiction foreign to our constitution, and unacknowledged by our laws; giving his Assent to their Acts of pretended Legislation:
For Quartering large bodies of armed troops among us:
For protecting them, by a mock Trial, from punishment for any Murders which they should commit on the Inhabitants of these States:
For cutting off our Trade with all parts of the world:
For imposing Taxes on us without our Consent:
For depriving us in many cases, of the benefits of Trial by Jury:
For transporting us beyond Seas to be tried for pretended offences
For abolishing the free System of English Laws in a neighbouring Province, establishing therein an Arbitrary government, and enlarging its Boundaries so as to render it at once an example and fit instrument for introducing the same absolute rule into these Colonies:
For taking away our Charters, abolishing our most valuable Laws, and altering fundamentally the Forms of our Governments:
For suspending our own Legislatures, and declaring themselves invested with power to legislate for us in all cases whatsoever.
He has abdicated Government here, by declaring us out of his Protection and waging War against us.
He has plundered our seas, ravaged our Coasts, burnt our towns, and destroyed the lives of our people.
He is at this time transporting large Armies of foreign Mercenaries to compleat the works of death, desolation and tyranny, already begun with circumstances of Cruelty & perfidy scarcely paralleled in the most barbarous ages, and totally unworthy the Head of a civilized nation.
He has constrained our fellow Citizens taken Captive on the high Seas to bear Arms against their Country, to become the executioners of their friends and Brethren, or to fall themselves by their Hands.
He has excited domestic insurrections amongst us, and has endeavoured to bring on the inhabitants of our frontiers, the merciless Indian Savages, whose known rule of warfare, is an undistinguished destruction of all ages, sexes and conditions.

In every stage of these Oppressions We have Petitioned for Redress in the most humble terms: Our repeated Petitions have been answered only by repeated injury. A Prince whose character is thus marked by every act which may define a Tyrant, is unfit to be the ruler of a free people.

Nor have We been wanting in attentions to our Brittish brethren. We have warned them from time to time of attempts by their legislature to extend an unwarrantable jurisdiction over us. We have reminded them of the circumstances of our emigration and settlement here. We have appealed to their native justice and magnanimity, and we have conjured them by the ties of our common kindred to disavow these usurpations, which, would inevitably interrupt our connections and correspondence. They too have been deaf to the voice of justice and of consanguinity. We must, therefore, acquiesce in the necessity, which denounces our Separation, and hold them, as we hold the rest of mankind, Enemies in War, in Peace Friends.

We, therefore, the Representatives of the united States of America, in General Congress, Assembled, appealing to the Supreme Judge of the world for the rectitude of our intentions, do, in the Name, and by Authority of the good People of these Colonies, solemnly publish and declare, That these United Colonies are, and of Right ought to be Free and Independent States; that they are Absolved from all Allegiance to the British Crown, and that all political connection between them and the State of Great Britain, is and ought to be totally dissolved; and that as Free and Independent States, they have full Power to levy War, conclude Peace, contract Alliances, establish Commerce, and to do all other Acts and Things which Independent States may of right do. And for the support of this Declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of divine Providence, we mutually pledge to each other our Lives, our Fortunes and our sacred Honor.

The 56 signatures on the Declaration appear in the positions indicated:

Column 1
Georgia:
Button Gwinnett
Lyman Hall
George Walton

Column 2
North Carolina:
William Hooper
Joseph Hewes
John Penn
South Carolina:
Edward Rutledge
Thomas Heyward, Jr.
Thomas Lynch, Jr.
Arthur Middleton

Column 3
Massachusetts:
John Hancock
Maryland:
Samuel Chase
William Paca
Thomas Stone
Charles Carroll of Carrollton
Virginia:
George Wythe
Richard Henry Lee
Thomas Jefferson
Benjamin Harrison
Thomas Nelson, Jr.
Francis Lightfoot Lee
Carter Braxton

Column 4
Pennsylvania:
Robert Morris
Benjamin Rush
Benjamin Franklin
John Morton
George Clymer
James Smith
George Taylor
James Wilson
George Ross
Delaware:
Caesar Rodney
George Read
Thomas McKean

Column 5
New York:
William Floyd
Philip Livingston
Francis Lewis
Lewis Morris
New Jersey:
Richard Stockton
John Witherspoon
Francis Hopkinson
John Hart
Abraham Clark

Column 6
New Hampshire:
Josiah Bartlett
William Whipple
Massachusetts:
Samuel Adams
John Adams
Robert Treat Paine
Elbridge Gerry
Rhode Island:
Stephen Hopkins
William Ellery
Connecticut:
Roger Sherman
Samuel Huntington
William Williams
Oliver Wolcott
New Hampshire:
Matthew Thornton

Values

What legacies matter to you

Chicago-SkylineThis morning, my wife and I got a sitter and joined some friends downtown for brunch.  It was a very delicious and rich lunch, and I think my digestive system is still recovering from all the rich and delicious food that we ate over the span of 3.5 hours (Now that’s some eating).  All this to state that one conversation that struck a chord with me was one in the car ride downtown with my best friend, my wife.

As we were driving, we were talking about present day politics (or lack thereof) and craziness in this world.  If you and I were to watch the news religiously, let’s be honest, it would leave us in a sad state of affairs:  This world is spinning out of control and in need of a Savior fast!  There have been impressionable moments in the memories of or children:  The Holocaust, World Wars (1 & 2), 9-11, The Black Plague, Military action that does not have the support (air, land and sea) for its soldiers, and so much more that can be lasting and in some instances devastating toll our the psyche and rearing of our children.  James 1:27 states, “Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.”

sensatinalism-wdse1201-pan-a-b systematic-desensitization-1-638We were talking about everything from gun control, conspiracy theories to the core of the problem and my wife, being astute, stated that much of the bad comes from this world.  The world (media and entertainment) promotes Sensationalism and Desensitization.  That is, the two issues that really need to be addressed by society are these two things previously mentioned.  1 John 2:16 states it like this, “For everything in the world—the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life—comes not from the Father but from the world.”  When we understand that the world is broken and is sinful and prideful.  James 4  puts it this way, “1 What causes fights and quarrels among you? Don’t they come from your desires that battle within you? 2 You desire but do not have, so you kill. You covet but you cannot get what you want, so you quarrel and fight. You do not have because you do not ask God. 3 When you ask, you do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, that you may spend what you get on your pleasures.”

When we, as sinners, sensationalize violent and sinful acts, how can we expect others not to follow?  Not to have the desire to be noticed?  Not to have the outcasts of society and the evil promotes agenda?  When we, as sinners, promote violent and irrational entertainment (movies, violent video games, pornography (sex trafficking) and the like) how can we expect sinners not to be desensitized and to not look at our brother and sisters as children of God?  When we focus on 1 John and James 4 and so much more Scripture on this topic, we begin to understand that we have a responsibility to our generations to come.  We have a legacy that we need to leave for those that God gave us to steward over.

Every parent has and will continue to raise their children the way that God has equipped you.  As Lance has stated in previous posts, there is no clear-cut way to raise our children.  For each of us it is different because each of us has different backgrounds and children to raise.  But the bible does give us some guidelines when raising our children.  The Bible gives us clear ways to go with our spouses and family.

Some legacy values to instill in our lives and children’s lives:

  • Stay on the path of purity:  By living according to God’s word (Ps 119:9)
  • Hide God’s word in our hearts (Ps 119:11)
  • Teach them to be good citizens and to know where their citizenship rests (Ps 119:19)
  • Give them healthy boundaries (Ps 119:33-40)
  • Teach them gratitude (True gratitude of what God has done for us and what he asks us to do to our neighbor)
  • Teach them generosity
  • Teach them to forgive and to be compassionate
  • Teach them perseverance
  • Teach them humility
  • Teach them responsibility
  • Teach them courtesy and respect
  • Train them in the way that they should go (by making your faith real and accountable to them)
  • Give them discipline (how can you expect them to be disciples of Christ and they don’t understand true discipline?)
  • Love them unconditionally (I tell my children that I will always love them no matter what, but some times I may not like their choices)
  • If they wander from the truth (bring them back)

Proverbs 3: New International Version (NIV)

5 Trust in the Lord with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding;
6 in all your ways submit to him,
and he will make your paths straight.

Blessings,

 

Dante